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Posted by: Jaksar Except for Luke McGregor who who took a great big annoying unfunny steaming pile of shit on the episode he was on the Aussie guests have been pretty good. Was that the actually retarded person? Don't think he actually is feeble minded but he spent the entire podcast making entirely unfunny comments preceded and followed by the most irritating high pitched whimpering sound.

It's the only Dollop that I've ever turned off as I couldn't take more than 10 minutes of that utter shit-stain. Posted by: Jaksar Except for Luke McGregor who who took a great big annoying unfunny steaming pile of shit on the episode he was on the Aussie guests have been pretty good. Was that the actually retarded person? Don't think he actually is feeble minded but he spent the entire podcast making entirely unfunny comments preceded and followed by the most irritating high pitched whimpering sound. It's the only Dollop that I've ever turned off as I couldn't take more than 10 minutes of that utter shit-stain.

And that's pretty much his act, he plays that awkward 'character' in everything he does. It's inevitable that it will be Wil Anderson, but would love it if it was one of the Dum Dum Club guys. PodcastOne have now implemented a subscription service for their podcasts. Anything older than the most recent couple of podcasts are now archived in subscriber only sections.

Some podcasts are subscriber only content. While it's their business decision to make, and while I really do enjoy some of their podcasts, I don't like them so much that I would like to pay for them. So as I usually forget to download podcasts regularly and usually do a lump download which is more convenient for me, I think I'll probably move on from the podcast thing now.

There are millions of self-publishing avenues. (I seriously considered going that way with Mr C but was very fortunate to get picked up by a small publisher in Melbourne.) I daresay there are some good ones, but never forget that anyone you use re editing or publishing services is into their editing/publishing service business as an end in itself rather than seeing your book project through to being on bookshop shelves. I seriously recommend that you join a local writers' group and/or do some creative writing courses (not necessarily uni).

You won't necessarily be quickly published, but you will get some other really valuable things out of this - entree to a writers' community; free criticism of your work by people who are genuinely interested; exposure to the ideas, techniques and styles of other would-be writers; advice on improving your work to the point that publishers or agents might take it seriously; and most importantly - contacts. It is contacts that gets your work out of the slush pile and into the hands of an agent or publisher. Having said all of that, spend the money if you want to but do it with someone reputable. Join the NSW Writers' Association and sign up for a mentor. My sister did that - she still isn't published but she was really happy with the NSWWA mentor experience. Also, if truly desperate, feel free to PM me about it.

I'm always interested in new writers having a go. If that post above was directed towards me, cheers. П™‚ I was only musing, though.

I'm only 15, and unless I really, really work at it I don't think I'll be able to have a career in writing. Gigastudio V3 21 2390 52nd. I think I'm more suited to journalism, but with the help of that course and then (hopefully) job maybe I'll have the ability to write a collection of short stories.

Novels are a mammoth task for Steinbeck and Stephen King; what hope do I have? But there is a long road ahead. I'm sure it's attainable. I've definitely thought about writers' courses in the past.

I think there are a fair few quality ones around the Norh Shore, so depending on my ability that will be an invaluable experience for me. One thing just out of curiosity - what were the thoughts of your publishers/agents/editors on swearing? This really intrigues me.

Obviously I can't do it for essays and creative writing tasks in (or out of, when it's a competion for example) school at my age, but I've always wondered if there is some, if not total leniency at the highest level. Posted by: (penguin) Novels are a mammoth task for Steinbeck and Stephen King; what hope do I have? In what context? For the sheer length of a novel or the attention to detail? If you love writing enough, you will persist with a project. Though for me, I decided to mix it up to get my enthusiasm levels back up. I found creative writing a few years ago to be a bit of a drag.

Had a major project I was working on for years but I lost the enjoyment of it and eventually I stopped adding to the work I'd done. So what I did was start writing a series of shorter stories that sort of link to each other (completely unrelated plot, backdrop, etc). My more recent episodes are generally between 3000-4000 words, sometimes longer.

I did a word count recently and once I tallied up all the episodes I'd done, I'd actually written 60000+ words in total. I never lost my enthusiasm once during that period. I managed to trick myself by breaking it up into smaller pieces. Novels have chapters, don't they?

In a roundabout way, I could even say one episode was one chapter in a bigger story/novel. So if you work long enough at something, it all adds up to something substantial. Maybe you could try a similar trick if you want to do novels one day. I've always enjoyed writing, having been a huge fan of authors like King and Koontz since I was about 10. I wrote a short story for school when I was a teenager about a serial killer in the USA.

Wish I still had a copy of it. Never went anywhere though, as other commitments got in the way.

I now have a son, who is 2 1/2 and have been reading a heap of Dr Suess. We're currently away on holiday for the week, but I've started writing a story about my sons Christmas holiday in the style of the great Dr. If I ever get around to finishing it of course. Posted by: (penguin) If that post above was directed towards me, cheers. П™‚ I was only musing, though. I'm only 15, and unless I really, really work at it I don't think I'll be able to have a career in writing. I think I'm more suited to journalism, but with the help of that course and then (hopefully) job maybe I'll have the ability to write a collection of short stories.

Novels are a mammoth task for Steinbeck and Stephen King; what hope do I have? But there is a long road ahead. I'm sure it's attainable.

I've definitely thought about writers' courses in the past. I think there are a fair few quality ones around the Norh Shore, so depending on my ability that will be an invaluable experience for me. One thing just out of curiosity - what were the thoughts of your publishers/agents/editors on swearing? This really intrigues me. Obviously I can't do it for essays and creative writing tasks in (or out of, when it's a competion for example) school at my age, but I've always wondered if there is some, if not total leniency at the highest level.

You seem fairly articulate for a 15 yo - keep at it. Over the course of your development as a writer you'll find it far less daunting to tackle long projects - in fact my problem is the opposite. I had to cut 40,000 words out of Mr C before they'd publish it, and it's still 192k words. Good value for money IMO. As for swearing, try the novels of Irvine Welsh. He's a very popular author and uses more cunts per sentence than anyone else I can think of.

There is a great deal of swearing in Mr Cleansheets, and yes there was some pressure to tone it down, but in the end the publisher agreed with me. You can't have a novel about vicious skinheads, Irish mafia and angry footballers without them speaking as you would expect such people to speak. As long as the dialogue feels right, it is right.

Caira Mr5412 Drivers. Posted by: (penguin) If that post above was directed towards me, cheers. П™‚ I was only musing, though.

I'm only 15, and unless I really, really work at it I don't think I'll be able to have a career in writing. I think I'm more suited to journalism, but with the help of that course and then (hopefully) job maybe I'll have the ability to write a collection of short stories. Novels are a mammoth task for Steinbeck and Stephen King; what hope do I have? But there is a long road ahead. I'm sure it's attainable. I've definitely thought about writers' courses in the past.

I think there are a fair few quality ones around the Norh Shore, so depending on my ability that will be an invaluable experience for me. One thing just out of curiosity - what were the thoughts of your publishers/agents/editors on swearing? This really intrigues me.

Obviously I can't do it for essays and creative writing tasks in (or out of, when it's a competion for example) school at my age, but I've always wondered if there is some, if not total leniency at the highest level. You seem fairly articulate for a 15 yo - keep at it. Over the course of your development as a writer you'll find it far less daunting to tackle long projects - in fact my problem is the opposite. I had to cut 40,000 words out of Mr C before they'd publish it, and it's still 192k words. Good value for money IMO. As for swearing, try the novels of Irvine Welsh.

He's a very popular author and uses more cunts per sentence than anyone else I can think of. There is a great deal of swearing in Mr Cleansheets, and yes there was some pressure to tone it down, but in the end the publisher agreed with me.

You can't have a novel about vicious skinheads, Irish mafia and angry footballers without them speaking as you would expect such people to speak. As long as the dialogue feels right, it is right. At $30 I'm thinking Mr Cleansheets is worth the investment, so hopefully it can also act as some inspiration as well as being a quality read.

Posted by: hillbilly what's the context thou? Go watch Erskineville Kings and check out Hugh Jackman's character. He fucking doesn't fucking stop fucking swearing throughtout the whole fucking movie the fucking stupid fucking c&%t. And ffs, people in REALITY fucking speak like that all the fucking time. I once heard a guy on a Western line train say 'I fuckin' told him he fuckin' couldn't have his fuckin' cake and fuckin'.fuck!' Sure, people do speak like that.

But do you really want to hear that in a film or read it on a book? Do authors or writers really need to resort to overusing profanity? It shows a lack of creativity I believe, if it is just the same words over and over again. It's a crutch that ultimately makes a work less satisfying to read in my opinion.

I've written extensively elsewhere about context for all sorts of action. Have a look at my website if interested ( ). I've had heaps of excellent feedback about the action sequences (especially football, violence and sex) but it's all down to context.

The football wouldn't have anything like the impact it seems to have on readers if they hadn't got to know Mr C pretty well by the time he starts playing in some proper matches. The reader understands his passions and motivations and wants it for him as much as he wants it.

As for the bonking, you have to ensure that the reader likes both the characters and desperately wants them to do it. That way the sex is genuinely satisfying for the reader rather than just some stark, one dimensional pornographic passage. You also have to make sure that the bonking somehow adds to the story, even if just via characterisation.

Above all, if you have more than one bonk scene, they all have to be different. I can't bear stories where the action (whether fighting, bonking or whatever) is exactly the same as previous passages. Posted by: milanesedynasty not sure if this is the appropriate thread but for Christmas I gave my grandmother who really doesn't want any presents from anyone and will generally knock back any item of value (shes quite well off and doesn't want shit from anyone) a photo I took and framed while i was over in Italy. She seemed to really appreciate it and even took down a photo of mum and her sisters to hang it up. I felt honoured to be quite honest. Here is the photo I cropped it a bit in the framing as well. My wife's uncle is an successful artist (enver.net) and last year he was working near Venice.

I commissioned him to go to my dad's village in Croatia (was once Italy when he was a child) and paint the view from the field near his childhood house looking up to the town centre. This was the field he and his brothers played in. I then gave it to him for Christmas. It was very emotional for him and I guess the perfect present for someone that is hard to buy for. He has already invited his brothers to come around and look at the painting.

WasteMyTime On the basis of your poem and your reference to existentially-plagued colleagues.why on earth are you so depressed at the age of 24? At your age, the future is still a rosy blur, full of promise. It shouldn't be getting dark and threatening until you approach 30.at which point sure.wallow in your existential misery. But until you've been: • evicted;had several unhappy love affairs;worked at several crap jobs with no future and cunts for bosses;had a couple of friends or family die;travelled enough to understand that no matter how badly off you are in Australia, you've still hit life's jackpot because you aren't surrounded by crushing poverty, disease and utter hopelessness in the knowledge that there are cunts in places like Australia who don't understand how lucky they are; and realised in your heart of hearts how pointless and insignificant you are in an evil world that truly hates poetry. •.please limit your writing to more hopeful subjects.like the chances of Sydney FC making the finals. Sorry for sounding like a cunt but I'm pissed.the Mariners lost the other night.and I'm feeling more than usually intolerant of existential malaise in the first world.